Travis Griffith
I enjoy a challenge. I get off on challenging other people’s existing perceptions and smile when my personal views and ideas are questioned.
And so I smiled while reading a comment from reader Marcia on my last post. Part of what she said was,
you must remember as much as you would like to believe that you are coming at this reading with an open mind, none of us is capable of completely being open to ideas that challenge our current views.
While that’s a powerful statement, I respectfully disagree. Regular readers know how passionately I once conformed to atheism. Part of me (a lot of me, sometimes) still wants to cling to an atheistic view because it’s easier and more convenient and somehow rebellious and cool. However, because my mind was open to entering a new spiritual paradigm, I reject atheism yet still strongly respect those who embrace it.
An open mind led to a new way of thinking.
That is how I am approaching my Bible read. I may not want to believe it, I may point out parts that seem contradictory, but my mind is open to the possibility that the Bible means much more than I’ve ever given it credit for.
That wasn’t easy while reading through Exodus. Frankly, I’m severely disturbed by it. I naturally have more questions, some of which I’ll pose here, and hope for a discussion on possible answers in the comments.
Before the last two weeks, there was one section of the Bible that I read: the Burning Bush. Something similar happened to me, which I can pinpoint as the moment I left atheism. That’s a long story but it ultimately put me on the path I’m on now. Reading that story with fresh eyes was inspiring and resonated as truth from the loving God who introduced himself to me.
From there, though, something changes in the book. God seems to go from lovingly proving his existence and bestowing hope on humanity to killing them. Why?
Why torture the Egyptians with plagues? Why kill all their first-born babies? If the only answer is simply, “Because they didn’t accept the Lord God,” then I can only shake my head in disbelief and sadness.
The theme continues through the explanation of Passover, when God passes over the people he likes to go “slaughter” the ones he doesn’t. It just makes me cringe.
The Red Sea is another example. The Israelites pass through the waters safely, but God drowns the Egyptians, causing the Israelites to celebrate.
Recent events have shown me that celebrating the death of our enemies makes us no better and I was under the impression that God supported that view. So I’m left confused by the words and events in Exodus.
As horrible as I find the killing of perceived enemies, I’m simply flabbergasted at the timing of the reveal of the Ten Commandments. Number six: Thou Shalt Not Kill.
Is there a difference between human sin and that of the divine?
My disgust went into overdrive when Moses was at Mount Sinai speaking with the Lord and the people below committed a sin: creating a golden calf and worshipping it. God and Moses entered an absolute rage, followed by these words:
Thus says the Lord, the God of Israel, Put your sword on your hip, every one of you! Now go up and down the camp, from gate to gate, and slay your own kinsmen, your friends and neighbors!
Are you kidding me? The punishment for one sin is to commit another? Now we’re not killing enemies, but our own people! This troubles me.
Then irony presented itself again a page or two later when God says, “The Lord, a merciful and gracious God, slow to anger and rich in kindness and fidelity…”
As troubled as I am so far by the content, I am impressed by the depth of characters so far and the continuity between generations of people, and how each contributes to the consequences of the next. The incredible depth of the Bible is beginning to show through.
Exodus: who else is troubled?
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Travis Griffith, Relief’s Blog Manager, is a former atheist now exploring what a spiritual life really means. His children’s book, Your Father Forever, was published in 2005 by Illumination Arts Publishing Company, Inc. Travis works from his home in Spokane, WA as a professional writer.
Hi, Travis. Thanks for more of your thoughts. I think it’s interesting that an “open mind” often seems to be “given” to an individual despite his or her best intentions to avoid it. I know that has happened for me a few times in my life.
Because you mention how the burning bush story resonates with your initial experience of God, I’m guessing that whatever happened may have surprised you the way the bush did Moses. My first burning bush moment had to do with being shown mercy — I was not punished in any way equal to my wrongdoing; in fact, I was forgiven, and I began to understand a little, maybe, of what the Bible meant by God’s merciful love.
I suggest, when thinking about Exodus and the writings that follow showing God’s continued dealing with Israel, that you might try a multi-stage journey of processing them. First, give yourself plenty of room for reacting in terms of your own assumptions. I hear you saying that killing is always murder, which may be true. That idea, though, gave trouble to Tinman in The Wizard of Oz, because he’d start crying whenever he stepped on an ant.
Next, give a listen to other possibilities, using, of course, sources you have come to trust. I’ve heard it said that a better translation of the commandment is “Thou shalt not murder,” and that might be worth looking into. If “murder” is the issue, then the Israelites weren’t at fault for following God’s orders to wipe out groups of transgressors.
The question remains regarding whether or not God was murdering people when he ordered them killed. It’s a huge one, but it brings up the question of why anything has happened. If the Bible’s a fairy tale, maybe none of the plot points really matter. But if there’s something going on along the lines of expressing what God was up to as Creator of the heavens and the earth, then it might help to imagine what creators are allowed morally. Can someone who makes something unmake it and not be liable as a criminal? Also, does the one who creates understand better than the created thing what the purpose is for that thing to exist (or to un-exist)?
There are so many questions to consider, and I think it’s an exciting undertaking to imagine that these ancient books were made to help real created things study the meaning of existence by a real creator. That’s just me, of course.
As I read this article I am reminded of the saying, “Do as I say not as I do”
I see it all the time in the grocery store when a parent smacks their child’s bottom or hand and yells, “I told you we don’t hit people!”
A bright shinning example of love begets love and violence begets violence.
I don’t know about other people but I believe in a God that is the epitome of love and kindness and like a mirror I reflect all the loving light and energy I receive from her to those around me. I’m guessing it would be hard to reflect a loving and positive energy for those that believe in a God that is jealous, spiteful and full of anger. What a long and hard road that must be to hoe.
Your writing on this subject is eye opening to say the least and I look forward to reading your thoughts in your next article.
I have read both of your articles and think you are an absolutely genius writer and am so glad that someone is reading the bible and advocating for people that may question religion, particularly Christianity. I have always questioned religion and God and that has frightened me all of my life. Every single word of this blog resonates with me and shows me that I am not the only one who feels this way. I look forward to reading your blogs as you read this book
Hi Travis- First, I admire what you are doing and I think you are doing the right thing by reading the Bible and analyzing it for yourself. Years ago, we could not even get close to the scripture and we were told it is too complicated for us to fathom. The Bible underwent several translations and modifications over the years. The folks who translated the Bible were the same folks who had every intention to make it go away, and had the perfect opportunity to distort and twist many aspects of the book. Now, will everything in the book is distorted, I believe not. Bottom line the book was not preserved and the original text was gone forever, and no knows where the Aramaic text went.
What troubled me the most when I first read it, is that I could not tell who the Author is of every book. For example, Exodus is allegedly written by Moses, ok fine. If you read exodus till the end, you will realize that the book goes beyond and post the life of Moses…how can Moses write something after his death??? And if someone else finished it off, why in the world his or her name not declared anywhere.
Also, later on you will find that none of the prophets of God were righteous, most of them committed Adultery, Murder, Atrocity, betrayal and in some cases, all of the above. Which really begs the question, is God really incapable of choosing good people as prophets to lead us from darkness to light? you will find that some may say, well God is telling you that these prophets are sinners too, hence, he is forgiven…fine..fine but we are not talking about sins here, we are talking about crimes which can put people in prison for their natural life and following God’s laws, they should have been stoned or hung for it. My final comment is that the Bible is a great book, but certainly was not preserved.
Historically, the only preserved book is the book of moslims which everyone is telling me not to read..i have not idea why…I will have to give it a try though…..good luck
Travis I came upon your column and absolutely love it! My older brother claims an atheistic view and I see the comparison of questions are so similar. Whereas you have had the ‘burning bush’ experience, my brother has not and our debate is not of the characeristics of God but whether he is. After reading ‘Misquoting Jesus’ by Bart Ehrman and other books of the like I do wonder at the accuracy and truthfulness of biblical stories. What solidifies my faith is the prophecies and their accuracy. These do cement in me the fact that God is,especially shown through the life of Christ. Now, as how to figure out His character (judgements,relationships,favor,mercy
acts,etc.etc.,) I settle on one thing and one thing only and that is ‘God is love’. The question then becomes what is ‘love’. I believe it is of such a deep demension that we will only truly understand it by experiencing it in eternity where we are ‘promised’ the answers to all our questions.So don’t get hung up in the details, relax and enjoy the big picture!